27 January 2012
Gradually and against my wishes otherwise, I have been
constructing a home for the homeless black cat. After twenty-five years of
caring for cats, I wanted to relinquish the responsibility of caring for
animals, and even though the household, against my wishes, had adopted two new
kittens, I declared emphatically that I
would not be caring for them. Whoever wanted the cats wanted to care for them.
I was finished.
But I was not that strong. Perhaps
I have never been so. I like to think of what I refer to here as weakness as
ethics. Daily and a bit distant from the cabin this homeless black cat appeared,
sitting passively in the woods beyond my windows, sensing a human presence and yet
fearing it. It was thin and scraggly, and on its neck was the wound of a recent
fight. It looked hungry and sad. At the beginning and before the regular cold
set in, I began to leave food out at night that I had taken from the house, and
by morning the bowl had been emptied. Since I never saw sign of any other
animal, I assumed that the cat had partaken. For the most part I didn’t see the
animal so much as sense its presence; the cat stayed quite clear of me. I had placed
the food bowls on the North side of the cabin and under the eaves, and as long
as the cat walked close to the frame it could remain invisible. Only the empty
bowl indicated its presence.
One night, however, it rained, and
the bowl in which I had left the food filled with rainwater, and even the cat
wouldn’t eat the soggy mess. And so, I took from in the house a long, low pine
table and placed it under the cabin eaves and over the food bowls. But in the
first snowfall the wind blew the heavy flakes into the bowls and again spoiled
the food that I had that evening brought out for the cat. And so I moved the
bowls and the covering table to the west side of the cabin where the wind did
not blow so strong and where the sun shone for a good part of the afternoon. Of
course, outside of the cabin door sat a useless low pine table changing the
aesthetic—there was nothing
to place on it and it was too low to serve much good—but I felt that now, at least, the cat’s food would
be safe.
As the black cat learned that there
would be regular meals, I began to see it more frequently. Sometimes it passed less
carefully and rather casually beneath my window, and sometimes it even sat
before the door looking in awaiting its meal. Still, if I moved toward it, the
cat always ran away, but since I sensed that it might be hungry, I put out the
food. Soon the black cat would return, partake of its meal and head out again
on its travels. It undertook, I considered, a large circular route through the
environs, because it seemed always to arrive at the cabin from the east and
north after it had headed out for the west and south.
Always the food bowls were under
the table and for the most part safe from precipitation. But the weather
eventually did grow very cold, and on several nights the food in the bowls
froze and became inedible. On those early frigid mornings, I brought the bowls
into the cabin to thaw out the meal, and I even occasionally placed the bowl
over my tea warmer (!) and cooked the cat’s meal, so to speak. Then I would
return the bowls to their spot under the table, and the cat would eat from the
bowls and head on its way.
Now the black cat began regularly to
come around twice a day at least; and twice a day I fed it. I began making
weekly trips to the supermarket for food that I stockpiled in my cabin.
It snowed (finally and considerably)
this week, and on a sunny afternoon atop the table outside of my door sat the
black cat wrapped in its tail, and though the snow was melting, the cat seemed
to be sitting, albeit resting, in the snow. I assumed it was wet and cold even
though it basked in the sun. And so, I went down into the basement of the house
and found there a small round cushioned bed we had once purchased for another
of our cats now deceased, and I placed this furniture on the table. I went back
into the house to fix myself a glass of tea, and while the tea brewed, I looked
out the window and saw the black cat comfortably resting in the bed with only
its head and yellow eyes visible. I think it looked happy.
I wonder when it will ever decide
it safe to enter the cabin. I do not
want a regular occupant, but I suppose I might welcome an occasional visitor.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home